A Twist In The Road
by Gina1982
Summary: RR please! S4timeline Cristina/Erica I am not sure how this will all unfold but i will not be following the events in S4 very much.
1. Chapter 1

A twist in the road by Gina

Rating R:

Pairing Cristina/Erica

Disclaimer: Grey's does not belong to me. If it did, things would be different. ABC and the show's creators are responsible for these lovely characters. This is why, I am not paying much attention to timelines for this story in respect to when Derek and Meredith really were or were not fighting and probably a few other things.

Summary: This picks up shortly after Erica takes the job at Grace. S4 timeline

A/N I am not following episode and seasons in which surgeries and a few other things happened.

a/n I read a couple of places that Sandra Oh commented about Cristina/Erica being paired up on the show. Whether that is true or not, I've no idea but here goes.

Ch. 1

Cristina and Meredith sat at Joe's having a few drinks. "Can you believe it! Hahn barely lets me scrub in on her surgeries and then berates me for sleeping with Burk." Cristina shouted a little too loudly for Meredith's comfort.

"She's a bitch I'm told." Meredith says quietly. "Just go to Bailey and see what-"

"There is no need to go to Bailey when the entire bar just heard this little outburst." Derek Shepherd said as he sauntered up to the two women. He tried to give Meredith a smile but knew it was to soon after their latest quarrel to have it reciprocated.

"Just mind your own business Derek." Meredith said in a chastising tone of voice. "I am with my person tonight so you do not get to intrude on our time."

"Maybe not but that pager does," he pointed at Meredith's beeping pager. "How many drinks?"

"I'll be fine with a coffee, if it's nothing serious." She jumped up and ran from Joe's with Derek smirking.

"You did that didn't you! You had her paged!" Cristina went to slash her drink on him but missed and the liquid hit the person that was walking around Derek.

"I did because I want to fix our lives. Now let's see if you can fix your thoracic career." He laughed and walked off as Cristina looked sheepishly at Erica Hahn.

"He was being a total ass and-"

"It wasn't bad," Erica said and finished wiping off her jacket with some wipes that Joe had handed her.

"You know," Cristina stood but quickly sat back down realizing that the alcohol had gotten to her in a bad way. "I don't sleep around just to get more surgeries."

"That's none of my business really." Erica said with a heavy sigh. She had pulled a thirteen hour work day and just wanted a quick drink to relax. She was now beginning to think that she should have had that drink at home.

"Then why did you comment on it?" Cristina asked as she finished her drink and then rummaged through her purse. "Damn it all to hell!" She shouted and slammed her hand down on the bar. "Mer has the car keys."

Erica shrugged and pulled out her phone. "I can get you a cab."

"The car keys have my house key on them." Cristina stood again and wavered.

Erica reached out and steadied her. "This is why I don't fraternize with residents."

"Why, because you think we all are beneath you?" Cristina barked as Erica led her to the door.

"You're one to accuse someone of treating people as if they are beneath me Yang." Erica quipped as she guided a stumbling Cristina into her car.

Erica drove around the hospital parking garage but no sign of Meredith's car. "Out of luck," she shrugged. "I guess Ica put you up on my couch for the night."

"Don't sound so excited." Cristina slurred and leaned back in the seat. "Nice ride by the way. Just how much do thoracic surgeons make?"

"If you're lucky, you will find out someday." Erica said and gunned the car towards her house.

Erica drove in silence as the rain began to fall. She actually loved driving late at night with a slow rain hitting the roof of her jeep. As she looked over at a near asleep Cristina, she couldn't help but smile. She saw herself in this young resident and knew that was why she was so hard on her. She knew that Cristina had the makings of a brilliant surgeon and that Burk had tried to make this road easier for Cristina. She knew that she had to be hard on Yang to make her learn how to be a surgeon rather than have what you want handed to you.

As Erica drove up to her house Cristina's eyes fluttered open and she sat up. "Whoa," Cristina put her hands on her head as Erica shut the jeep off. "Fenced in yard, spot lights and a big deck with flowers everywhere. This is a nice house on the outside."

"Even drunk you try to observe everything I see." Erica said in a bland tone of voice as she helped Cristina to the car.

"You know that I am a better surgeon than Izzie Stevens." Cristina said from out of nowhere.

"I also know that you were allowed to scrub in as though you were a resident when you were an intern and that's not acceptable. Burke was giving you favors because you were putting out." Erica replied as she unlocked the door to a spacious foyer.

"Look I did not sleep with him for those favors!" Cristina said in a choked tone. Deep down, she feared that at least part of what Erica said was true. Burke had really messed her up and fed on her competitiveness.

Erica ushered Cristina into the living room and turned on the lights. She barely got a glimpse of Cristina wiping her eyes. She tried to think that it was the rain she was wiping off; but another part of her wondered if she really was being to hard on Cristina. "Let's drop this and get some sleep." Erica pointed to the stairs. "The room is the first door on the right and the bathroom is on the left."


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2

Cristina awakened to the smell of bacon and eggs frying. She rubbed her temples and then eyes. She then looked around the bedroom and had to think where she was. The room was sparsely decorated, which gave Cristina the notion that it was a guest room. The bed was comfortable enough that she felt she should sleep in it all day. There were a couple of paintings on the walls and the carpet was off-white. "Well I don't want to spill anything in here." Cristina grumbled and got out of bed.

Once she figured out where the bathroom was, she went in and washed up. "Yang," Erica startled her. "My sister usually sleeps in the room that you did when she visits. There are some clothes in there that should fit you if you want to grab a shower." Erica said and handed Cristina a cup of coffee and then walked back out.

Erica filled in a couple of charts she brought home as breakfast finished and she waited for Cristina to get out of the shower. As she was setting the table, her work phone rang. "Hahn," Erica answered dully.

"This is Dr. Stevens," Izzie said. "I don't know about Mr. Arnold's surgery," she began and then rattled off his vitals.

"Stevens, he is allergic to anesthetics. Have you figured out how we can do surgery without them?" Erica asked as Cristina came into the room.

"No," Izzie looked sad as she spoke. "I'll get his discharge papers-"

"Erica," Cristina spoke at the same time as Izzie was speaking on the phone. "I read where they performed that surgery in India while the patient was awake."

"Not yet Stevens," Erica said and picked up her plate as she hung up the phone. "Hurry up and eat that."

"Hahn doesn't want me to discharge him yet and I think I heard Cristina's voice there. Izzie was saying to Meredith.

"I wonder what's up with Bailey, she isn't here today." Meredith said as Dr. Torres began barking out orders as to where the residents need to do their duties today.

"Stevens, hang until Erica gets here." Callie said and headed off towards an OR.

"I am thinking Hahn showed that she could be nice. I ran off with Cristina's keys last night." Meredith said as Erica and Cristina came in.

"Stevens book an OR. You are good at talking to patients, so you're with me. Yang, go do the routines on the rest of my patients." Erica finished speaking and headed towards Mr. Arnold's room.

"She is letting you do something at least." Meredith offered meekly and handed Cristina her keys.

"Why does she do this to me? I am good at what I do." Cristina said with an angered look on her face.

"So am I but Bailey has taken me off Derek's service and put some new resident that came over from Mercy on." Meredith said with an angered tone.

"Gray," Callie came out of the OR. "You're with me."

"At least you are getting to do a surgery." Cristina said testily and walked off.

Several hours later, Meredith, an intern and Cristina stood watching Erica's surgery. "I'd love to get in there," Meredith said. "And I do not even want to specialize in Cardio. She is amazing."

"I could be too if she'd let me in there." Cristina said as Erica began shouting at Izzie to get the man settled down.

"She doesn't even need the intern calling out the vitals while Izzie plays councilor." Mark said with a chuckle in his voice. "There is our next chief of surgery. Anyone want to bet?"

As Mark finished speaking, both Cristina and Meredith ran into the OR. "Keep verbal vital checks going for me so I don't have to look Grey." Erica said and continued working.

"Maybe if I sing-"

"Don't even think of it Yang." Erica said and the other two women couldn't help but laugh. "Come watch this," Erica waved her over and began explaining what she was doing.

As they closed up Erica looked at Izzie. "Stevens, general surgeon, maybe even psychology. You're very good with patients in a personal way. Surgeons are not supposed to get that personal. I am not putting you down but it's something to think about."

"Are you telling me not to try to specialize in cardio?" Izzie asked in a put off manner.

"No but Dr. Webber told me to try harder with my teaching skills and that is my observation. Chart the patient." She said and walked out.

"Hey Erica," Callie called out as Erica was cleaning up from the surgery. "If you are off tomorrow, want to go grab some drinks and shoot pool?"

"Sure," Erica said as residents began to file in. "I'll be at Joe's 8ish." She said and the two walked out.

"Come on Cristina just go dance with the guy," Izzie teased as she sat down next to Alex.

"Would you knock it off?" Cristina chided and sipped her drink.

"It's to bad Mer and George work the weekend," Alex added and guzzled his drink.

"So she can even play pool." Izzie pointed at Erica, who had just beat Callie in their pool game.

"I should go show her how to play. Mchardcore can't win at everything." With looks of dismay from her friends, Cristina headed to the table. "Can I get in a game?"

"Do you have your keys Yang?" Erica asked in a condescending tone as Callie stepped aside.

"No," Erica said with a smirk on her face. "Because when I beat you, you will just bitch about it."

"I'll go sit with Mark," Callie said with a grin.

"God I think that man sleeps with everyone," Cristina said and sat her drink down.

"Not me," Erica said and readied to play.

"Well believe it or not, me neither." Cristina said and took a shot.

"That's because he isn't your boss." Erica said and waved the waitress over to refill their drinks.

"Fuck off Hahn." Cristina said and missed a shot. "Damn it!"

Erica gave a small smile and made her shot. "That was to easy Yang."

"Do you ever lose anything?" Cristina sneered as Erica finished off the game.

"When I was your age I did." Erica said and got them another drink. "Check Joe, I've had enough."

"Mine too please," Cristina said, not wanting a repeat of last night's drunken stupor.

"I got it Yang. You were good entertainment." Erica said as she watched Callie and Mark fondling. "They should get a room." Both women said simultaneously.

"I guess everyone's gone off to screw around." Cristina said pointing at the now empty table where the medical people were sitting.

Erica gave Callie a nod to let her know it was okay to bust up the friend evening, after receiving a questioning look from her. "Can't figure out if she really wanted to go with him or rescued." She said to Cristina as she finished her drink.

"Well, I think rescued but she should not have engaged in the foreplay." Cristina said as the two walked out the door.

"I can't believe I got away with an eleven hour day." Cristina said with the realization of how amiable their conversation seemed to be. At times, the usual insulting banter was there but now, it seemed, they could be civil for short periods of time.

"Don't get used to it." Erica said and stopped at Cristina's car. "I am not scheduled to work tomorrow night. I see that you are on-call starting at midnight?" Cristina nodded. "Good then, I am going to come in and work the trauma unit with you. I am going to show you where Burke screwed up and probably Shepherd." Having said that, Erica waved and left Cristina standing beside the car in wonderment.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N A bit of medical stuff in this one but things progress for the two women a bit also. RR please

Ch. 3

It was near midnight when Erica pulled into Seattle Grace. She could not believe that she was doing this to help teach someone. This, she felt, went beyond the call of duty when it came to teaching. "Damn liquor makes me think stupid shit." Erica chastised herself as Dr. Bailey met her at the door.

"Dr. Hahn, how far do you want me to take this lesson?" Bailey asked with delight etched on her face.

"You are my chief for a few hours Bailey." Erica said with a grimace.

"Thanks for asking about my son when you phoned earlier." Bailey said with a tinge of worry on her face.

"Let's do this," Erica said and headed in towards Bailey's Nazi camp.

"All right people, we have an accident and GSW." Bailey shouted. "Yang and Hahn, you're with me. Karev and Stevens, you're with Dr. Torres." She shouted and they all rushed off.

For the next five hours Cristina watched Miranda Bailey order Erica around. She did the grunt work of helping remove a bullet from a man's stomach, run labs and stitch up three other people. These were things a Thoracic surgeon didn't normally do but Dr. Hahn did them with accuracy, quickness and a less than stellar bedside manner. "Now then, get a nap Hahn. It's settled a bit." Bailey said and kept the thought of how much the two of them were really alike inside the hospital to herself.

"Hey Erica," Addison Montgomery said as she walked up to the women. "I may need you in a couple of hours so a nap may be good. I was going to page you but Callie told me you were teaching."

"Sure thing," Erica said and walked towards an on-call room.

"Yang, I hope to the high heavens that you learned something in here tonight. If not, Dr. Hahn will take it out on all of us." Bailey said with a smile and walked off.

"I think I will go eat. Maybe I'll get lucky and be used in whatever you need Erica for?" Cristina had a hopeful look on her face.

Addison shrugged. "You are a go getter Cristina." She laughed as Cristina walked out.

At just after 7AM, Cristina headed to the on-call room. She was hoping to catch Erica before the surgery so that she could scrub in. She knew Izzie would be hot on the trail and she was determined to get in on this one. As she opened the door, she did a double take. Callie was sitting on the bed next to Erica finishing breakfast. "Hey Cristina," Callie said with a smile.

"Yang," Erica said in way of greeting as she stood up. "Thanks for the breakfast Callie. Did you want something Yang?"

"Um, Addison said she needed your help and I want to scrub in." Cristina couldn't understand what she was feeling. She had planned to march in and demand to scrub in but when she saw the closeness of the two women, she had mixed feelings. When Erica had chastised her over sleeping with her bosses and pointed out that she slept with men so that could not happen, Cristina was irate at the accusation. Then when she walked in and saw the closeness of Hahn and Torres, she wondered if Erica did indeed sleep with women. She also wondered why she was even pondering the subject.

"Yang, can you hear me?" Erica prompted in an irritated voice for the third time. "Go prep."

"Really?" Cristina dashed out of the room without another word or thought.

"She is a good surgeon," Callie said and smiled at Erica.

"Did you get to do Ortho only Dr. Torres?" Erica asked as they walked out of the room.

"Point well taken," Callie said and brushed Erica's arm with her fingertips. "I am going to go home and get some sleep. Call me later if you want to hang out."

"Sure," Erica said and headed up the hall towards Addison. "What's the scoop?"

"What you feared, a tear in the ascending aortic wall. Also, blood is going fast through the aorta." Addison said and shook her head sadly.

Erica went quickly into the OR where Cristina was reading the charts. "Dr. Hahn,, this is vascular and she's just a baby."

"Addison has talked to the parents Yang. We will be doing a modified Bentall procedure. We will be replacing her entire ascending aorta, supplanting her aortic valve with an artificial titanium valve, and re-implanting the coronary artery ostia, the small button-like structures on the left and right of the aorta, into a synthetic material." Erica looked up and saw a few surgeons standing around ready to watch. "If we don't do this Dr. Yang, this child will die."

Dr. Hahn, given the rarity of this surgery and that it has a lot to do with vascular, I will assume that you have not performed this." Chief Webber said carefully. "I've never seen this done myself and certainly not on a baby."

"I scrubbed in on one some years ago. With Dr. Elis Grey." Erica said. "We will be doing this procedure under deep hypothermia and circulatory arrest, during which the heart and head are packed in ice and cooled to 64 degrees, while the blood flow to the body and brain is stopped temporarily. So basically if we leave the child in this state to long, she will become brain dead. The surgery will take ten or eleven hours in total. I want to try to leave her under arrest and hypo for under twenty minutes." Erica finished speaking and the silence save for the machines was palpable.

"Say no more then. Let's get moving people so Dr. Hahn can go to work." Webber added and took a seat out of the way to watch.

"Stevens, scrub in with Dr. Montgomery. This is going to take several hours and I may need you to assist." Erica said and glared at a nurse who was laughing under her breath.

"Dr. Yang will not lapse if it kills her. There is-"

"Enough, let's go." Erica continued as they readied for the surgery. "People, this child has probably a 30percent chance of coming through this so stay focused."

"I didn't know she performed with my mother." Meredith said as she waited for Erica to come out and give her instructions on tending to the child for the rest of the night.

"Nor did I," Derek said as the chief walked in from speaking to the press. "Harper Avery time for sure."

"Most likely," Webber said with a beaming smile. "She is not gonna like this press coverage."

Just then Erica, Addison, Cristina and Izzie came out of the room. "Everything is going well chief. We did it."

There was a large round of applause from medical personnel who stood around awaiting the final results, even though they watched when they could get a break from their own duties.

"We were all worried but hoped you weren't in there yelling at those residents for nothing." The chief said and shook Erica's hand. "Now the child is Senator Drake's grandson so the press awaits you."

Addison took a quick glance in the mirror as did Izzie. Their faces showed disapproval. "Yang, let's go." Erica said and walked towards the front of the hospital.

"At least she isn't leaving you out Cristina." Meredith said with a smile.

After thanking the senator for allowing she and Cristina to perform this rare surgery and making a quick statement about the difficulty of it as well as the fact that they are thrilled the child pulled through, Erica and Cristina headed to their cars. "You're not into the press either I see." Erica said as they stopped by Cristina's car.

"No, Izzie and Addison will love it though." Cristina said quietly. Although she got chastised a lot in the OR, Cristina was so glad that she finally got to scrub in and especially on a surgery with such magnitude in the medical world. "Dr. Hahn, thanks for not cutting me out of the recognition." Cristina shuffled her feet and looked at the ground.

"I am not Dr. Burke Yang." Erica said and rested a hand on Cristina's arm. "He almost broke you and, although I will piss you off by not allowing you to scrub in all of my surgeries, I won't push you down into the ground so I can go higher on the ladder."

"Dr. Hahn," Cristina looked up into Erica's big blue eyes and for a second felt lost in them. "Um, you had never done that surgery as head surgeon?"

Erica watched Cristina, who seemed to be a little nervous. This was very unlike the resident. "You look more tired than I feel. You want some Chinese?" Erica offered in way of telling Cristina that she did a good job in the OR.

"Um, sure." Cristina replied as she wondered why she was feeling so strange.

Erica took a key off her ring. "You should only beat me by a few minutes." She handed the key to Cristina and walked off.

Cristina stood there for a few seconds with a shocked look on her face as Addison walked up to her. "Yang, you all right?"

"Yeah I just, well, I just don't understand Dr. Hahn." Cristina said carefully. "I mean she was a tyrant in the OR today and now she invites me for dinner and gives me her house key to go wait for her to pick it up."

Some people, such as you, are not people people. They reach out without words." Addison said, turned away and smirked before walking off.


	4. Chapter 4

Ch. 4

Cristina stood in Erica's living room looking around. The house was in a good neighborhood and near a lake so had to have cost a pretty penny. Though there were few decorations in the living room, everything matched. The coffee table looked a bit cluttered with medical magazines and a couple of books but other than that, the house looked scarcely lived in.

Cristina's mind went back to Erica handing her the house key without any hesitation and how she left her hand on her arm just a little longer than then what was considered normal. Not to mention the fact that Cristina let her leave her hand on her arm. "Stop it Yang, you are being stupid." Cristina picked up her over-night bag, which always held a clean outfit and went into the guest bathroom. As she finished washing up, she heard the door close and quickly dressed.

"Hey Yang," Erica said and sat two boxes of food down on the table. "Every good doctor keeps clothes in their car." She chuckled and smiled at Cristina. "I am going to get washed up real quick. There is an unopened bottle of wine in the fridge and glasses are in the cabinet." Erica said and headed up the stairs.

As Erica finished washing up, she checked her phone. She was glad that Callie understood she was tired and didn't feel like hanging out. She wondered that, if she were so tired, why did she invite Cristina over? She knew that hanging out with Callie would mean up for another four hours. The two got on so well and could talk for hours on end. That is something that Erica never had with anyone because she didn't let people in her life on a personal level. There was something intriguing about Cristina though, Erica thought as she shook her head and walked into the kitchen.

"Ah, you have it all set up." Said Erica as she sat down across from Cristina.

"Yeah, I am not a cook but I can set a good table." Cristina smiled and laughed.

"I don't cook much either." Erica replied as they began to eat their dinner.

The meal was eaten with typical conversation about the behavior of others at work and med school. "I can pay for my part of this meal if you want." Cristina offered as Erica refilled their glasses. "I mean, you paid for my drinks the other night and cooked me breakfast."

"It's fine," Erica said as she tried to get her mind back into guarded mode. "I also put you through the ringers in the OR so we're even."

"How do you do it?" Cristina questioned and sipped her wine. "You know me; I say it as I see it. So, you are a total bitch at work and friendly out of work to the person you are the bitchiest to."

"So your question is Dr. Yang? Clarity is one of the most important attributes that we can give to a patient or family member." Erica said with not a hint of the smile that was on her face a few minutes ago.

"That, how do you shut off person Erica and become this Tyrant Dr. Hahn machine?" Cristina answered confidently.

"How do you do it? Take a look at yourself Yang and maybe you will see. You go around the hospital as if all of the other residents and interns are beneath you and even some of the attendings. I think it drives you nuts because you can't bully me as you do the others." Erica said as she pored herself a third glass of wine and held the bottle out to Cristina who accepted it.

"Okay," Cristina answered. She didn't know what else to say but knew that, once again, Erica was right.

Erica looked at Cristina and then laughed heartily. "Callie hates it when I give that won word answer."

"So we are both bitches, we are not good with people and exude the confidence that we are the best doctor's in the hospital. That's why we clash." Cristina smiled a full smile for the first time since Burke left her.

"Something like that," Erica said and downed the rest of her wine. "Apparently we neither like to divulge what we are thinking to others and aren't really the touchie-feelie type. However, I think that I am more closed off when it comes to matters of the heart than yourself and you can be blinded by certain people and situations that they may bring to the table more than I can."

"Fair enough," Cristina said. "I know you won't tell me why you are more closed off so I won't even ask. Something tells me that it doesn't have to do with sleeping with a boss."

"You would be correct." Erica said and stood. "I'll put this wine away before we become alcoholics."

"Good idea," Cristina said and wondered if she should get ready to leave. Part of her thought she should but another part of her was enjoying this exploratory conversation with Erica. She knew what to call it because it is what she had with most every one that she was getting to know. Something told her that Erica did the same and that Erica allowed fewer people into her life than Cristina did. This was a scary thought to Cristina because she let very few into her inner sanctum.

"So, you aren't Callie's boss. Is she who you sleep with?" Cristina decided to go for it and see if she could get a reaction to gauge the situation. There was a good sized betting pool to think of after all and she was determined to win it.

"I told you that I slept with men Yang." Erica replied with not a hint of emotion on her face.

"Well, people wonder and some do talk." Cristina added.

"So this is my payback for tossing that little sleeping with bosses issue at you?" Erica said with an inward chuckle.

"One of these days I will figure it out. You know exactly what I am doing don't you." Cristina said with a hint of frustration on her face.

"Of course I do and I must say that I am enjoying it immensely." Erica said and laughed. "Callie is a bit flirtatious and I actually enjoy her company so it makes people talk. So what did you bet Yang?"

"I said no because it's hard to know what Callie really does want." Cristina said with a smug look on her face.

"Are you going to buy me dinner with this pool money?" Erica smiled at Cristina, who beamed in triumph. "I mean, if I go along with this answer shouldn't I get something out of it?"

"I only want to win if that is the right answer." Cristina replied and shrugged.

"The problem is, if you tell them that is the correct answer, they will be gossiping about you. We have had drinks and you have been at my home twice. Are you willing to take that chance? Also, do you want to possibly hurt Callie's feelings by dragging her in this with her issues?" Erica asked as she mentally pushed down the feeling of discomfort. There was one thing that she wasn't truthful about in her life to anyone and that was her sexual preference. Most of the time, she wasn't even truthful to herself about this issue. Dianna was the name of the lady who made her this way and she hadn't planned to change it. But, once in awhile, when she was with Callie, to a degree, her inner self wanted to. Once in awhile of late, when she looked into Cristina's dark sad eyes, she was inclined to see if she could make them happy.

"The pool has 500 bucks in it. So, of course I would." Cristina said honestly but had the feeling that Erica was putting her walls back up. She had this feeling because she knew what she would do.

The two spoke for a few more minutes before Cristina readied to leave. Erica knew that the nice thing to do would be to offer her the guest room again seeing as it was late and rainy. She did not do that however, because she felt that some distance was needed to stop this. Whatever this was, it needed to stop.


	5. Chapter 5

Ch. 5

A few days had passed with not much time for Erica and her two female friends to visit. Work and Erica trying to avoid the situation completely, had a lot to do with it. With Callie, she had to admit, there was an attraction. Callie and she were getting to be very good friends with slight flirtation on occasion. Flirting was something that Erica had not allowed herself to do with a female since the heartache that Dianna had brought her many years ago. She did not want to be hurt again and would do whatever she had to do to keep from letting it happen.

With Callie, keeping her feelings put away in one of her many compartments wasn't so hard. Callie and she would go out and have fun and flirt. Then Callie would go have a romp with Mark. Erica knew she did not want in the middle of that which made it easy for her to keep her attraction in a box that was put way back in her mind. Compartmentalizing was an art that Erica had perfected years ago for many reasons and it had suited her well for most of her life. However, with Cristina, it seemed a little more difficult to compartmentalize her feelings. Erica wasn't sure why but that maybe Cristina was a challenge because she was nearly as withdrawn from people and feelings as Erica. The key word was nearly because Dr. Yang was missing the art of compartmentalizing.

The day after Erica and Cristina's evening at Erica's house, Erica had decided that an occasional, all be it brief, stent with a male was not going to work anymore. She was attracted to women and had never been fully satisfied by a man. Thus she decided to go to a different area of the city and hang out at a gay bar.

Though she wasn't drinking on her third visit to the bar, she had hooked up with a lady that she had spoke with on her previous two visits. She had gone on Tuesday, Thursday and then Friday. After talking for awhile and a lot of flirting, they went to a hotel. This is something Erica had done a few times with the men that she would decide to go around with. Though her dating wasn't a frequent occurrence, it did happen from time to time. She would go out with them for just long enough to fulfill a few sexual urges and then end things. Her promiscuity was very light to say the least but it was enough for her.

Meeting her dating partners in public places and getting a room for their more intimate outings was one of the ways that Erica kept things out of the personal realm. She believed that once you took them to your actual home, you were letting them inside your personal life. This helped her rationalize her way of doing things when it came to matters of fulfillment and it had worked well up to this point. However, her mind wasn't in the groove this time.

Once the two had got to the hotel, had a glass of wine and very light dinner, the make out session was progressing nicely. Though Erica's body was going through the motions, her mind was elsewhere and that bothered her greatly. Just as things were about to progress into sexual frustrations being doused, Erica's pager went off. With her mind saying this is for the best and her body screaming no it isn't, Erica jumped up and phoned the hospital. "this is Dr. Hahn," she said upon the phone being answered.

"Dr. if you are twenty minutes away, you need to be hear in ten." Mark sloan practically shouted. "Chief Webber collapsed, the residents are freaking like a bunch of kids and I am not equipped to handle this. Also, there is a damned bunch of bus accident victims rolling in."

"I'll be right there." Erica said then made her apologies and quickly left the hotel room.

Cristina was trying to finish her charting so that she could go home at the end of a 63 hour work week. She was used to pulling even more hours than that but was glad to get a couple of days off for a change. At least part of her was glad for this respite, while another part of her dreaded it. All was normal throughout the week but one thing For Cristina. She wondered why she cared about Erica and Callie's situation. Moreover, she wondered why she was wondering about Erica to begin with. They hadn't hit it off well from the get go and still didn't in the OR. For some crazy reason, she felt drawn to the surgeon and this bothered her because it was causing her to wonder if Erica was right. She went after her bosses to gain a higher position on the surgical ladder of greatness.

Cristina hadn't seen much of anyone during the week but during work hours. Meredith suspected something was on her mind because she often withdrew when that happened. Meredith assumed that it was Burke and tried to talk her into a better mood a time or two. She didn't let on to Meredith that it wasn't Burke and suspected that Mer knew she was going back into private mode, even with her person. Cristina tried to blame it on her needing sex, which she had felt sexually frustrated of late, but suspected that Meredith didn't believe her.

"Dr. Yang," Mark Slone shouted. "Go in with Dr. Webber. He passed out on me and there is a huge accident. I've had to page Dr. Hahn to come help out." He raced off as Cristina quickly withdrew from her thoughts and raced in the direction of the Chief's office.

As Cristina ran into the office, Dr. Torres was writing something down. "Good, you're here. I need to go round up the troops for the bus accident. Erica is on her way, keep him alive!" Callie raced off as Cristina looked at the chief.

"I better not get the blame for him not being taken to an examination room," Cristina grumbled and read the notes over to try to figure out what else she could test.

"Yang, what's going on?" Erica said and came into the office.

"I don't know Dr. Hahn. I was told to come in here and then they all left." Cristina said honestly. She had got to scrub in with Erica only once this week and nothing had changed in that regard despite their comfort zone out of the hospital. What exactly was their comfort zone and how did it happen so fast? Cristina wondered as Erica looked over Mark and Callie's notes.

"Yang, I said go get a stretcher or wheel chair, whatever you can find. Are you losing your hearing?" Erica barked and snapped Cristina out of her thoughts.

"I'm sorry," she raced from the room and returned quickly with a chair. "This was the closest. I will help you get him in it."

"Get me some cold water," Erica said. His bp is elevated but pulse is normal. "I think the stress has gotten to him and they all freaked out."

Cristina did as Erica said. "Can I do the honors?" Cristina asked sheepishly.

"Go for it," Erica said as Cristina splashed the water on his face.

Once the chief woke up and Erica ran him through a few tests, the two stood outside the hospital getting ready to leave. "That was a little scary." Cristina said.

"At least he went home. I think he needs a break." Erica replied. She knew that someone had to tend to the situation but also knew that someone else could have easily handled the situation. She could have been finishing up with a passionate evening about now and hopefully kept thoughts of other women out of her mind. Instead, here she stood with one of those women and she looked very pleasing to the eyes about now.

"Dr. Hahn," George O'Malley was running out of the hospital's front doors. "Don't leave as we've got a cardio patient in bad shape."

"Let's go Yang," Erica said and headed back into the hospital.

It was nearly 2:30 in the morning when Erica, George and Cristina finished with the patient. He coded on them a couple of times but they finally were able to get him stabilized. Both Cristina and George got the brunt of Erica's disapproval in the OR and were glad to get out of there. "She is brilliant, but such a bitch sometimes." George said with a relieved chuckle.

"Sometimes, I got the brunt of her wrath." Cristina said and grimaced.

"Because I am a man." George laughed heartily and they walked their separate ways.

"Chauvinistic pig," Cristina grumbled as she spilled the contents of her purse in the parking lot and stood there froze.

"I had to wait all night to find you," Momma Burke said with an unfriendly look on her face. "My son sent me to get his things from the apartment. He couldn't stand to come back after what you did to him."

"What I did?" Cristina asked with a confused look replacing the one of shock.

"You left him at the alter because you were having a fling with another doctor." Momma Burke said angrily. "You took advantage of his cardio knowledge and stomped all over his heart."

"What?" Cristina's eyes fell to the ground and her face became void of all emotion as she fought tears. She realized that she couldn't give Burke all of herself nor be what he wanted her to be. But the things she did give him had compromised who she was. For him to lie about her, cut deep.

"Mrs. Burke," Cristina heard Erica's sharp voice but stood statue still with vain efforts to calm her breathing and tears which now flowed fast. "You go tell your son that we will mail his things to him. You go tell your son that Doctor Erica Hahn has what he loved most besides surgery. Erica knew that Burke would need proof because that was the kind of man he was. She knew this would hurt and anger him and that he deserved it. She walked swiftly over to Cristina, hoping that the shaken resident wouldn't smack her, and pulled her into an embrace. She wiped the tears from her eyes, tried to give Cristina a work with me look knowing that Cristina wouldn't register it and planted a deep kiss on her mouth.


	6. Chapter 6

Ch. 6

As Cristina's world turned on its axis, she registered that Dr. Hahn was yelling at momma Burke. She then registered that tears were being wiped from her eyes and she was being kissed. She knew that she had brought some heartache into Burke's life but for him to lie on her like that was devastating. Though she had given him a lot of grief, she gave up parts of who she was just to please him and that is something Cristina had never done before. She felt as if she were drowning and Dr. Hahn was her lifeline.

As Erica watched momma Burke yell another threat and leave, she knew that she should pull away. She could feel Cristina responding to the kiss and see the anguish in her eyes and knew that they should stop now and maybe talk. As Cristina pushed her body into Erica's and moaned into the kiss, Erica knew it was going to be a struggle for her mind to over-rule her sexual frustration.

Erica pulled away slightly and looked at the hospital doors. "Meredith is coming." She said and moved Cristina's hands from around her. The look she saw on Cristina's face was one of hurt and emptiness but there was a flicker of desire in her eyes.

"you don't understand," Cristina said with a hint of desperation in her voice.

"If you want me to understand, let's go to the car. I can't just sleep with you to get off in the state that you are in." Erica said and ushered Cristina to her car as her tears began to fall again.

As Erica drove, Cristina tried to get herself under control. "You want to sleep first?" Erica asked knowing that she was giving Cristina a way out of telling her whatever it was.

"I know it's late and we both could use sleep but if I don't get it out," She stopped talking and looked down.

Erica fully understood what Cristina wanted to say. If she didn't talk now, she would close up and become more hardened than she already was. "Okay," was Erica's response.

"When I lost my baby, I did let Burke comfort me in a way. But I didn't let my emotions fully out. When he wanted me to move in, I didn't want to but did it for him. I was going to get married for him and I lied to everyone and let him talk me through his surgeries when he was hurt. I did it all for him because I couldn't love him like I needed to and it scared me. So I let him take little pieces of me and make them into what he wanted them to be. Now he lies on me like this and all those little pieces that turned me into something I am not, are gone. I don't have many left and if I don't start feeling something other than this numbness inside me, I am scared that I will never feel again." The tears began to fall again as Erica pulled into her drive way.

"Come on inside Yang." She said quietly, got out of the jeep, went around to Cristina's side of it and let the shaking woman lean on her.

"I know you understand what I am saying here." Cristina said as they walked into the house. "You don't show your feelings most of the time but when it's necessary, you can. I can't. When you are fighting for a patient, bitching me out in the OR, or helping me like you did tonight. I want to at least be like that and I am so scared that he has ruined me for life." She began to sob again as Erica pulled her into her arms and held her firmly.

"I had a Burke in a way. Pre-Med school, she was an assistant professor. We had life all mapped out for the next ten years. We had an apartment and I thought we were doing well. That is until I walked in and caught her in bed with my best friend. Apparently they had been having a fling for sometime and she blamed it on my upcoming internship. You know, the extreme hours and so forth," Erica said as she tried to fight off the enjoyment she was getting of holding Cristina in her arms.

"So this is why you don't let people get close to you." Cristina said and snuggled closer to Erica. "You know, this is strange. I don't like to be touched much, am not into this snuggle stuff but I feel pretty relaxed."

"Maybe you should just try sleeping," Erica said. "Yang, I have never told anyone about my ex, not even Callie."

"Off limits to Mer, got it." Cristina said and felt that maybe she could really go to sleep. "Um, I don't really want to be by myself. I-"

"Not a problem," Erica said and stood up. "I feel like an intern," she said and pointed at the clock as they walked to her room. "Going to wash up real fast."

As Erica went into the bathroom, Cristina tried to relax herself. The pain was eating away at her and had been, if she told the truth, since she lost the baby. She looked around the pristine bedroom and couldn't believe where she was standing. How could this woman, who was such a bitch in the OR, be so kind outside the OR. Cristina knew that Erica didn't allow many people to know this side of her but was beginning to feel good that she was one of them. As she looked at the expensive looking painting of the clear ocean waters with waves in the center, Erica came back out. "That was done by my first heart surgery patient." She pointed at the painting. "He was trying to help pay for his surgery and I got it at a benefit they held for him."

It's really good," Cristina said as she went in to wash up.

As Cristina was washing up for bed, Erica wondered what in the hell she was doing. Things had gone well for her up till the point when she came to Seattle Grace. First it was Callie and the mild flirting and now Cristina had found her way, not only into her home, but in her bed. Erica knew that she was going to have to put her Dr. compartment in place in order to not get in an entanglement with this woman. Who, in a sense, was as strong-willed as Erica. Erica hoped that Cristina would make this easy and not pursue anything beyond allowing her to help her through this ordeal. At least part of her hoped this, while another part hoped she would pursue it because Erica's mind was making itself up and it wanted the Asian Dr.

As they settled in for sleep, the two women's eyes met in the predawn hour. Cristina had asked if she could have the lamp on low because, when she was upset, a little light calmed her. "So, Yang, who turned you and Burke in?" Erica hoped that if she could cling to a wrongdoing in the medical profession, it would keep her hormones in check. She was a by the book Dr. and did not believe in committing illegalities whatsoever.

"I did," Cristina said as her mind drifted back to the kiss. "That was my ultimate betrayal against him I guess. I just couldn't do it anymore because it was wrong on all levels. Never again will I allow a human being to have that much control over my soul. I should have been released from the program. Then Webber sticks me with you so I guess I am paying my penance because you are truly a tyrant Dr. Hahn."

"So are you Yang." Erica said softly as she looked at Cristina's face. "The interns fear you, hell you don't even know their names because you don't give a shit. You think they are beneath you."

"I guess you are right," Cristina said and tried to fight off her next musing. She wondered if part of the reason that she could never give herself fully was that maybe she liked women. She was fairly certain it was mainly because she was driven and focused in her career but maybe, if one flip-flopped those two reasons, there was the true answer. It was this or she was in such a need for comfort that she enjoyed Erica's kissing so much.

Erica had always been meticulous in every choice that she made in her life. Everything was thought through more than once. She wanted nothing more right now than to throw caution to the wind and have sex with this woman. She couldn't really call it making love because, most of the time, the two didn't even get along. It was just recently that they forged a speaking relationship outside of the office. Then there was Callie, Erica really did like Callie a lot but she had no idea where Callie really stood. She did however, think that, right now, Cristina wanted her. For whatever her reason was, her desire was just as strong as Erica's.

"Okay, so we are both trying not to do what it is apparent we both want." Cristina said in a matter of fact tone. "I am not going to get all clingy and want to move in with you tomorrow. Nor do I want a relationship so why not just have some fun."

"I certainly am not going to want you to move in with me tomorrow," Erica chided back. "Hell I don't know if we really even like each other much as friends. So, I couldn't agree more."

With that out of the way, they moved closer and began kissing. The kisses were slow and light at first, with Erica looking into Cristina's eyes for hesitation. Since there was none, she deepened the kiss and pulled Cristina closer to her.

Within minutes the kissing became aggressive and filled with desire from both women and the clothes were quickly removed. "Very nice breasts," Erica said and began to kiss them.

"Your mouth is as expert as your hands Dr. Hahn," Cristina said breathlessly as the two pleasured each other immensely for a couple of hours.


End file.
